From the moment we are born, we are part of a race we never wanted to be in, we are measured by milestones and compared endlessly with any peers we share our life with. We are numbers in charts and checkmarks in lists of accomplishments, in other words, we are what we do. And for those of us who are the firstborn child, the pressure is even greater because we are the first example of our parent’s product.
There are many issues I see when parents want to raise copies of the collective ideal child. Children lose their own identity and start trading who they truly are for who they are told they have to be. Children lose the capacity to look within and follow their inner wisdom and they start relying on the external to live their life. Children grow with a sense of unworthiness and not being good enough because the ideal child is an unattainable goal. Children grow pretending to be someone they are not and this is basically living at war with themselves creating deep wounds that they have to heal later in their lives. Children grow into adults that are unable to maintain healthy relationships because they don’t live in alignment with who they truly are and their own values.
The question is, Is there another way to raise our children? Yes, OUT OF THE RACE
As conscious parents, we start with the concept that every human being is unique and this really helps us to get curious about who our children are and it helps us to honor their being by allowing them to unfold into who they truly are. This principle also helps us understand that if every child is unique, then there is no race they need to be in.
For us, adults raised to win the race, part of the inner work and healing of childhood wounds is understanding that we need to step out of the race and create our own lane.
-Isabel Stafford, Family Alchemist™
#isabelstafford #outoftherace #authenticity #weareunique #winninginlife